Week 16

There's a line in Father of the Bride (the fiance goes to the bar after they fight about a blender and her dad goes to talk to him).  The dad tells him that Annie comes from a long-line of over-reactors but that with each generation it lessens so their children may actually have a shot at turning out normal.  This is my family except with worrying!

I'm never at a loss of things to worry and stress out about.  Add to that a 3rd, and unplanned, pregnancy and I have been freaking out about SOMETHING since August 13!

The two things that are at the top of my list most of the time are how Lucy's going to adjust (she's just so darn little and still needs so very much), and how in the HELL I'm ever going to be able to do anything or go anyplace again.  I'm so very glad that at least Stella can buckle herself into her carseat and I don't have to worry about her running off while in a store. I wonder if it would be too much to ask for her to carry the baby into stores in the infant seat so I can carry Lu and the diaper bag? :)  IF I manage to get us all into a store without any incidents in the parking lot, how exactly do people get both kids into the grocery cart and have room for their um... groceries maybe?  I'm going to have to buy everything at Target just because they have those crazy big carts!

Ok, I can use a pack for one of them and put the other in the cart.  That will work right?  Let's just hope I never actually need to make more than one stop or just a quick little stop.  It's going to take me twice as long to get kids buckled/unbuckled, into packs, safely across parking lots than 90% of my errands take.  It's exhausting just to think about.

Things have actually been getting a bit easier around here (at least until the last 2 weeks when Lucy has gotten super clingy and throws a fit if I put her down... that should be fun with a newborn).  Lucy can play a bit more independently, and several times I've thought, "Oh man, and now we have to start all over!"

I'm already missing sleep and showers!  While Stella's not exactly old enough to do much to help, (oh how I'd love somebody in the house just to hold a baby for 30 minutes a day) I'm SO grateful that she's not younger than she is.  3 under 3 sounds like a recipe for the crazy house to me!

Please know that my worries are NOT IN ANY WAY and indication that I'm not supremely aware of how blessed we are and grateful for it every. single. day.  I know, believe me, I know!

Knits!



Maybe it's the fall weather, but I've found my knitting groove again and I'm SO VERY HAPPY about it! There's something so relaxing about putting my feet up (for a few minutes) at the end of the night with a fire going and my knitting.  I also admit that I enjoy wearing handknits and I REALLY love seeing my babies in something that I knit them.  I love knowing the time and love that went into picking just the right the pattern and yarn for them as well as the love that goes into each stitch.  It makes them so special to me.  I have each and everything saved for them to put on their own littles if they choose.

My favorite finished knit in a LONG time was a dress (which ended up being more of a tunic) for Lucy.  I adore the pattern and color.  I wish I had finished it earlier so she would have been able to wear it a bit more.  The first time she wore it to a family function she went crazy on berries and got berry juice all over it - I'm still trying to see if I can save it!

I'm sure you've seen the boot cuffs that are all over Pinterest.  I've heard people say that you can make them out of sweater sleeves, but there are some CUTE patterns for knit cuffs too!  This was my first pair, but most definitely not my last.

And finally, (for today) an ear warmer.  I think these are ADORABLE on the right person with the right hair.  Neither of which I have.  I tried to fake some bangs for the picture and pulled back some of my hair and I actually like it, but I don't think I'd ever have the guts to actually wear it anyplace.  Jim's cousin asked me if she could buy a pair of boot cuffs from me and then last week she asked if she could pay me to make her an ear warmer. We both loved this pattern and it turned out to be CRAZY easy. This would be the perfect first knitting project for someone who's been wanting to learn.  It's small and you just knit a rectangle.  When you're done you sew the two ends together and then wrap yarn around the seam to hide it.  It's kind of strange making something that someboday wants to PAY for, but once in a while it would be kind of fun.



I'm finishing up Lucy's hat for Trick o Treating, then it's another of these, more boot cuffs, hats for the family, maybe a mitten Christmas garland, and Stella's been begging me to work on her blanket.  Also, as soon as we find out if this little one is a he or  a she I can start knitting for them!  Normally, such a long "to-do" list would stress me out, but with knitting I love having a long line of things waiting for me!

Happy Hump Day!

Food and a fall picture dump!

First of all, let me vent about food for just a minute.  I didn't have issues with being sick with either of the girls.  Sadly, that wasn't the case this time around.  I seem to be over most of my nausea, but I can't seem to get past some of the aversions. Typically, Jim and I have very different tastes in food.  I'd love to eat veggies/pasta (ok, and cereal) for dinner every night and he's a meat eater.  Usually we can kind of work around it.  I can eat ground turkey and boneless skinless chicken breast so most dinners involve those and once in a while I'll make him something like meatloaf or a steak or he'll BBQ meat for himself and I'll just eat the rest of the dinner.

Lately I haven't wanted ANYTHING to do with any kind of meat. Since I try to do crockpot meals about twice a week during the school year it's made it difficult. I've made several dinners that would normally be ok and about half way through making it I know I'm never going to be able to eat it.  All I can think of to eat for dinner is the normal veggies/pasta or curry/Thai.  Meal planning has become a total nightmare!

Anyway, enough of the "poor me". We had a great little fall family day today.  We went to the pumpkin patch, stopped by a bridge I'd been wanting to take pictures on forever, and then carved pumpkins after dinner. The girls are both whooped! I didn't edit any pictures (because I'd have never gotten them posted - that's just the way life's going right now!) I have knitting sitting here next to me calling my name. ;)

And a note: this little 1 1/2 year old REFUSES to look at the camera!

And one more note: What the heck is going on with Blogger?  Everytime I check a preview it has a different font!  I have no idea what ugly thing you're seeing - sorry!

We were telling her to move her arms and she yelled at us, "I'M COLD!"

14

 As the weather gets darker earlier these pictures are going to get harder and harder to get.  ISO was cranked to 3200 and IT SHOWS!  :(

Of course, my baby wanted in on the picture taking action.  Love this sweet and silly little pea!

"Belly" pictures

 I've been planning to do some pictures KIND OF like the ones I tried to do with Lucy.  I got a dress to wear in all of them - I thought it would be fun to watch the belly change/grow that way.  There's a really cute chalkboard idea on Pinterest, but I don't have a good place in the house to do it and let's face it, there's no time in my life to make a cute little drawing on a chalkboard every week!  These pics aren't great, the light in the room I use is pathetic. 

I'm 14 weeks now so obviously I've missed 2 weeks - it's too early to be slacking!  :)

Some thoughts

Thoughts on this surprise pregnancy:

*  WHAT THE HECK?!?!?!  After 5 years, 15 IUI's, and countless dollars to get two beautiful daughters in our lives, how the heck did we end up with an "oops" pregnancy???

* As I'd told a friend earlier in the summer, there was a part of me that REALLY wanted a third child.  We'd always imagined having 3 and talking about 3 (2 girls and a boy) and part of what really ticked me off about the whole inferility thing was not having control of how big of a family we were going to have.  On the other hand, there was a part of me that REALLY did NOT want a third child.  We're older than we ever meant to be having kids and we have two healthy babies whom we love with all of our hearts.  Things were beginning to get a bit easier (as Lu gets more independent) and I was looking so forward to certain things with the two of them.  I dreamt of letting each of them choose a vacation when they're teenagers.  Not just a vacation, but a "where would you most like to go on this entire planet? Awesome, let's do it together" kind of vacation - now it's less certain.  Plus, we just didn't want to tempt fate (and I did NOT want to revisit getting up at night!)

*  Lu is just SO. DARN. LITTLE. to be anybody's big sister!

*  I think it's a boy (of course, I though Lu was a boy too).  So much is different this time.  With the girls my skin was great, and I could go a day between hair washes.  No the case this time (boo to both of those).  I only got sick once with the girls combined but was sick most of the first trimester this time around.

Interesting little tidbits:

*  We got pregnant with Stella on our last IUI attempt before starting the IVF process.

*  We got pregnant with Lucy on our last IUI attempt before moving on with the adoption process (in fact, I got our adoption information packet in the mail the week before we found out we were pregnant!)

*  We got pregnant this time the month before I was going to get an IUD.  I was just waiting to start my next P so I could call the Dr and get an appointment (just to NOT have to deal with them during the school year - sorry if that's TMI)

*  In March of 2007 Jim and I went out to dinner and this was my fortune:

 At this point we'd been trying to get pregnant for years and I just sobbed.  We got pregnant in April!

*  In August of 2012 Jim, Stella, Lu and I went to dinner.  This was my fortune:

I teased Jim that it meant that there was going to be a 3rd baby!  I even posted it on IG with the caption, "Ha ha - poor Jim!"  One week later we found out we were pregnant.    Just crazy!

Overall?  We definitely went through quite a period of shock.  I even admit that I spent a night in bed sobbing and begging to loose it.  I'm terrified that there will be something "wrong" that will alter this happy little route we've been on.  (I've even been whining about having to get a bigger vehicle).  It's all petty.  It's all irrelevant.  If ever there was a baby that was "meant to be" this has got to be it.  There isn't an "oops" for us, just a "destined".  I'm still not looking forward to so much of the baby phase, but I'm certainly thrilled to have another member of the family, or clan as Jim now calls us.  I'm thrilled for my lovely girls to have another sibling to share life with.  I'm thrilled to get to hear "Mama" for the first time and snuggle my sleeping babe.

As my Dad used to quote when we were struggling for one, "It will be well."